Protect Your Teens from Gangsters in Local Pizzerias

A few years ago, Little Brother and His Girlfriend were on a date at Cannova’s Pizzeria.

beware of Fine Gentlemen here

Cannova’s is a pizza place in my hometown. They have white tablecloths, tasteful decorations, polished wood linings along the walls, and dishes of Parmesan cheese with a spoon so you can spread your own. The last time I was there, they had a jazz duo (piano and acoustic bass). Very smooth. Very classy. It’s located in an iconic and historic downtown area of my hometown, the type of local place you can’t find anywhere else. This is the type of joint I would host a 1930s Gangster Party.

Anyway, so my Little Brother and His Girlfriend were on a date. They just happened to sit next to a Fine Gentleman who started talking with them. This Fine Gentleman deemed Little Brother and His Girlfriend adorable enough to pay for their meal. Little Brother probably thought that was nice of him until he got home . . .

. . . where Little Brother’s loving family started warning him about connections to the mob and the consequences of such a lifestyle. Mom asked him what he had to do in return. Dad said he would help get him out of the country. Big Brother asked if he had to wear vests and fedoras everywhere now. I was the one to quiz him about torture techniques, how to effectively hide a body, and psychological games for manipulation.

Don’t look at me like that. Of course I was the one who knew all the interesting tidbits.

Suddenly, the Fine Gentleman of Respectable Stature became a Gangster of Questionable History. Little Brother probably regretted telling us this fact about that particular night, mostly because he was suddenly looking over his shoulder for people tailing him to school and probably refused to be alone with a stranger. Time passed, no gangsters came calling to my brother (that we know of) for questionable activities and such. He started to think of the event as light-heartedly as the rest of us.

What probably happened is that Little Brother and Girlfriend ran into the local philanthropist and got on his good side. But you would agree that him meeting a gangster unscathed is a better story, right?

Comment Question: What’s the biggest embellishment you added to an otherwise boring story?

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One thought on “Protect Your Teens from Gangsters in Local Pizzerias

  1. Just because he was a nice guy doesn’t mean he wasn’t part of the mafia. But your brother’s probably not close enough to be let in on all the mob secrets. Omerta and all that. I for one choose to believe that the Fine Gentleman was a kind-hearted mobster.

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